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philosophy

13 more days to go

I don’t know what are the chances of me going – so 13 more days to go is a rather optimistic title. The Passport wasn’t received yesterday. All hopes are for Monday and if the Monday hopes are met, then I will have to be in Kolkata on Wednesday (Tuesday being Diwali and a holiday).

Wednesday would  be the 10th-more-day-to-go. Will that be too late to get a Visa on time? More important than that – what if I don’t receive my Passport even on Monday?

Had I been few years younger, still chasing the dream of living the life style of successful rich men, London is all that I would have been thinking about, day in and day out. However, as on date, I am least bothered. I fail to see any achievement if work takes you places. Having already decided to refrain from luxuries of life – there is no real desperateness – no real worry.

What I do worry about is the time that is passing by without me being able to do anything significantly about anyone who can be called needy. I gave off 10k to my bro so that he could buy a 1 lakh bike – but I can’t call him needy. I bought mom a washing-machine. At least in this case, the need factor was slightly high. A WM might not be regarded as an item of luxury by many who read this post, but to many who don’t have access to net, who don’t have access to even a private toilet, a washing machine is indeed an item of luxury. So though I fulfilled the self-imposed duty of a son, I cannot convince my soul that I helped a real needy person.

As I sit on the lovely sofa in my guest-house hall, here in Bhubaneswar, I wonder whether I am sitting in the right place. How will I ever get to feel what these needy feel if I stay away from them? Where are all those folks who I think I can be of great help? I talk about my family being beyond my real family. But where does this bigger family live? Something has to be done about this. I need to leave the guest-house and find a small place in a poor locality. Wondering about poor, and blogging about your thoughts is one thing. Deciding to leave the luxuries of your guest-house – free accommodation and food, dedicated cooks, sweepers who clean the place daily, 24 hours electricity (thanks to the generators), gym, wifi, driver to take you to office – is another. Living in such an environment, I am not doing justice to my thoughts. I better move out.

This diwali, when many of you would fly home to be with your family, many would have already flown to your family, and those who wouldn’t, will at least miss being there. For a change, I would neither be flying back home, nor would be missing my family – I would instead be busy searching for them, right here in Bhubaneswar, only to ensure that soon I start living with them, than away from them.

And if you ask me, reaching London is easy. To me, the more important thing is reaching ‘the real home’.

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