Mostly on Ma Kali

It takes to be an A. R. Rahman to give break to so many new singers in a single album. Saw the list of singers in Raavan? At least I had never heard of people like Vijay Prakash, Mustafa Kutoane, Keerthi Sagathia, Mohamed Irfan, Am’nico, Reena Bhardwaj etc. before. And yet, not a single singer sounds misplaced. Way to go.

I flew to a different city to meet my girl last week. It started raining and all when I reached. It wasn’t a downpour as such – just mild drizzling and all that. Cool, moist and kinda fragrant air – the kind of fragrance you smell when it rains after a long time. Very romantic indeed. I had rushed directly from an important meeting to the airport in Ahmedabad – so hadn’t found time to change. I was dressed in a suit. Clad in that, standing in the soft rain, I stood on a footpath near a bus-stop and waited for her. I didn’t know where she lived but she had told me she was on her way. A yellow street light lighted me. She came soon. She stood on the other side of the road. I must have looked pretty sexy to her – through the wet air between us, standing in that yellow light, dressed in suit and all that. I waved at her, crossed the road and said the first thing that came to my mind – ‘LOL, you are so fat’.

I know I am mean. But I find difficult to be pretentious with people whom I am very close to. To be fair to her, she definitely isn’t fatty fatty fat fat. But she is fat enough for me. I mean, if you know me, you would know that I have this weird pot-belly-phobia. I just want all the pot-bellies in this world to shrink and get flattened. So the maniacal me, got real hyper and stuff with regards to her shape when I finally met her after months. All the while I stayed with her that evening, dining and whining together, I kept telling her how much I loved her and how fat she was. A million times. I wonder why she didn’t kill me.

By the way I must share this with you – it feels crack-assly awkward to meet someone whom you have met only twice before (once for 15 minutes and once for a day) but with whom you have spent hours and days and months on phone, talking about every possible thing that there is in this world to talk about. I mean, we had even done all those naughty things over phone, that one can envisage. And yet, it kept feeling awkward for a long time, every time anyone of us touched the other. Of course, this feeling went away after a day and we soon got as comfortable in each others presence in real, as we had been over phone.

She is a real psycho – my girl. Both of us wonder why I still love her. After spending so much time with her on phone, I am now kinda used to her incessant twaddle. I can handle that. But I still don’t know how to handle her when she transcends to the ‘Ma Kali‘ avatar of hers. I have never seen anyone lose one’s cool like she does at times. Ma Kali hurls abuses like only Ma Kali can. And if you are not aware of this roop of hers, you might actually take offense, assuming that’s how she actually is. It’s pretty freaky. Ask Taploo. Or LoLy. But then this mode goes away in like an hour or so. So I will kinda live with that. In fact, she usually turns a lot friendly and loving and all that after this Ma Kali phase passes and she realizes what a scene she had created.

She is also more possessive than anyone I have ever known to be. When I am talking to Ali, she accuses me of being gay and when I am talking to LoLy, she acts as if we have an affair. Both of us wonder why I still love her. But may be love is random. May be love is all about accepting people with all the imperfections that they possess. Love is all about being patient and cool headed when you are being doubted and accused. Love is about faith. And instinct. And hope. Love is about many more such things that I don’t know.

When I imagine ourselves together, I don’t see a perennially happy couple. I see ourselves fretting and arguing over insignificant issues, trivial matters. And yet I don’t see myself running away from her. I see her cooling down every time she heats up. And then I see us loving each other like babies. And then it keeps repeating. Looks quite okay this way. Quite real.

Ok. Anyway. Written enough. Before I end, do watch Ironman – II. Good fun.

PS: Since I have jotted down so many negatives about my girl, to save my life, let me also list down certain aspects that might make her blush.